Unexpectedly Rooted

When I chose the word rooted as my word for the year 2020, I think it’s safe to say I had no idea that I would literally be rooted inside my small apartment, more specifically to the blue couch in my living room, for an undetermined amount of time.

For an extrovert (or as my mom lovingly refers to me, a social butterfly) that statement alone fills me with anxiety. I will be rooted, here, in my apartment, for an undetermined amount of time. No hugs, no high fives, no social gatherings. Again, the anxiety rises in me.

During this season of isolation and uncertainty, how can I grow and move forward?  When being with others is what brings me joy and fills my soul, where can I find those things while I stay home in order to keep others safe? 

When waves of anxiousness and loneliness begin to wash over me, I remind myself that I have permission to feel those feelings. They are normal and they are real. But I also remember that those feelings don’t get to control my life. I know that even in this season, rooted unexpectedly at home, God is working in me, in our community, and in the world.

I know that even in this season, rooted unexpectedly at home, God is working in me, in our community, and in the world.

So I take the time to feel, but I also take back control and turn to healthy outlets – I say a prayer, I pick up a paintbrush and turn on some worship music, I go for a run, I do something nice for someone, I have a living room karaoke dance party (cue “Into the Unknown”),  I FaceTime my family, I have a Zoom party with my friends.

I’m learning that even here, rooted on this blue couch in my small apartment, there can be growth. There can be relationships and community. There can be moments of joy and laughter. And here, rooted in these spaces and in God, is where I will see my heart and this world begin to heal. 

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